Worthless and Weak

Happy 26 for me!!

The first thing that congratulated me on my birthday was an automated e-mail from a dating website. Now, over the course of the day, various family members called, and I went out with friends, so I had a good day and everything, but for a while it was kind of depressing.

Also, I ran 6.5 miles today. I think I'm really kicking ass here!

Labels: fall, scooters, vacation

For the past three weekends, I've spent at least time (dinner or lunch usually) with this friend I've recently made.

I feel like I connect with her intellectually in a way that I don't with almost anybody else. A lot of times when I'm with friends, there will be a time when I start to get bored. This has yet to happen with her, I've probably seen her 10 or 11 times now, and each time I can't help but think the evening (or day, or whatever), ended too soon.

She's quite physically attractive, and I admire her integrity.

The thing is twofold, - when I first met her, she told me that she wanted to keep the relationship platonic. The second thing is that, (for lack of a better term), I don't feel like I'm in a crush with her. It just feels different - can't really explain it.

The question isn't if I should force it- (or, to phrase it more generously, take a chance)- at this point, that's dumb. Until she tells me otherwise I'm going to respect her decision, because the status quo right now is "making a really good friend," which is totally awesome and probably more of what I need right now than a girlfriend.

The question is: am I actually attracted to this girl romantically, or am I just thinking about "more" purely because she's an attractive female? Or is this a distinction without a difference?

Labels: what this blog is really about

I entered into a bowling league that was six games long. For the first couple of weeks, we absolutely crushed, going 5-0, with the highest average score, and topping out at over 1500.

Today was the championship game. And we lost... Our best player was in Toronto, and, for whatever reason, the pins weren't falling our way. Our player who had wild swings had an off day, he's put up scores 100 points higher than he had today.

So it was tough, to come so far but falter at the finish line. I had a good time (and two of my better games, going 136 and 139).

Labels: fall, scooters, vacation